Stress

You see yourself as a high achiever, but really, you are an over achiever. A high achiever has abundant talent and is motivated to produce and perform by a healthy ambition. The high achiever is in constant motion but when he achieves his set goal he feels a sense of satisfaction and personal accomplishment. He deserves some R & R (rest and relaxation) and he takes it. He does not feel a need to prove anything to anyone.

How come you don't feel that way? Because you are an over-achiever. You are abundantly qualified and talented but deep down you don't feel contented with yourself or your accomplishments. "What have I really achieved in my life," you will say to yourself. Your inner voice says: "Nothing really." Even though you have many "feathers in your cap" and have made excellent contributions to the community and society, you are not satisfied and never will be satisfied with what you have accomplished. You are driven by a negative self-perception -- that you are not really any good to anyone. You rarely enjoy your accomplishments and never seem to be able to relax. You are stressed out, but you keep going anyway. It's the way you are in the world.

Living under this type of driving stress is not healthy. It can lead to many diseases including hypertension, heart failure, stroke, kidney disease, stomach disorders, diabetes and migraines.

When there is a threat from a physical aggressor, stress is healthy because it induces a series of chemical reactions in the body to help us have the necessary increased oxygen capacity and muscle energy to defend ourselves or to escape from the threat. However, these bodily changes like increased heart rate are of no value whatsoever when they are a response to non-physical stress and our ego. Increased heart rate, blood pressure, muscle tension and increased respiration are not helpful or healthy responses to a critical comment or a so-called "make or break" performance on this presentation/exam/interview/challenge .

Stress that leads to the activation of a healthy defense mechanism was meant by the body's manufacturer to last a few seconds - just enough to defend itself. It was not meant to be an ongoing physiological response to feelings of job insecurity, family pressures and emotional ups and downs. These threats to our state of emotional equilibrium can last months, even years. Chronic and sustained physiological changes which are inappropriate to the perceived threat are what give rise to stress related disease.

Response to any threat, real or imagined, depends on the strength of your ego. Even when the stresses seem overwhelming, if you had a healthy ego and self-concept, you would know deep down in your psyche, or soul, that you are a capable person and are less likely to feel overwhelmed.

Based on Let Us Make Man, by Dr. Abraham Twerski, C.I.S. Publishers, New Jersey, 1991, pages 29-34